A New Project

I love our "formal" living room. I never thought we needed or wanted one, but now that we have one we use it so much. I think much of our successful use of the room stems from it's location and our floorplan. We have a continuous loop from foyer to family room to eat-in-kitchen to dining room to living room. And the boys run that loop often. We use it for reading, playing games, spreading out large sets of toys that need floor space, entertaining, and just relaxing. We have a couch and a loveseat and that works perfectly for our family but anytime someone else is over I always wish we had more seating. The dining room is part of the same room, so we have all those chairs, and we use the piano bench when we have to but I have been keeping my eye out for a couple of matching chairs to add to the mix. And recently at Saver's I found them.

Perfect wingback lines, classic legs, and comfy cushions - still in good shape despite the dirty exterior. Truth be told: I love the flame stitch pattern! And I don't completely hate the color. It matches our rug perfectly, which is unfortunate since I'm not fond of the rug & would like to get rid of it. But it also matches the pink in our artwork, which matches the green in the couches. But eventually I'd like to replace those couches too so we have a lot of scheming to do.

I have convinced myself that I can recover these chairs at home, after reading a bunch of posts like this, this, and this. I certainly can't afford to have them professionally done, so we'll be on the hunt for fabric soon. When my Mom asked what my husband wanted for his last birthday, I convinced him that his fondest wish was for new chair fabric. And the next month I asked my Mom for the same thing for my birthday so between her contributions and a little scrimping of our own we will start shopping soon. And I told Aaron that what I wanted for my birthday is for him to go fabric shopping with me. (I'm sure that gift will be coming along soon - 5 months later!) I have no idea what we're looking for... but I know I want a pattern, and probably a bolder color choice. Now if we can only figure out what that color might be.

We need to come up with some overall design decisions for our living room; things like color and style. I started Pinterest boards for ideas for the chairs and the entire room. Any suggestions?

Old Friends are the Best. But New Ones are Priceless.

These are my friends. I've known some of them since I was born. Some from preschool. And all through elementary. A couple have moved to other states and we all relish visits with them. They aren't in this picture, but we were so lucky to get all the locals together recently for lunch at my house.

Old friends are the best. Although I don't always see these women often, when we all get together I always feel a sense of belonging that I don't find anywhere else. These friends have stood by each other through 34 births, the deaths of parents and siblings, loss of jobs, health issues, parental struggles, and the problems of everyday life. I am so lucky to have them. They are caring, talented, beautiful wives and mothers. If every girl went through junior high and high school with a set of friends like this - the world would be a much happier place.


The problem is that many of us have stories like this - BFFs that we met when we were young. But how many of us live near these BFFs now? I was used to spending time with my friends every day. And then they got married, moved away, got their own lives - the nerve of them! Now I'm not one to make friends easily, but I've been looking for another BFF or two for years. And I've been lucky enough to find a couple - and then we moved away too.


So when I heard about the new book by Rachel Bertsche called MWF Seeking BFF: My Yearlong Search for a New Best Friend, I knew I had to read it. When I finally got my hands on it I started reading and pretty soon I realized it was a non-fiction book. Which was good news, since I always need to read more non-fiction. And while the book reads like a narrative most of the time, there was lots of facts & research dropped in too.

Rachel moves to Chicago after she gets married and although she has plenty of acquaintances, she longs for that close relationship that she has with her old friends. She wants someone to call up & say, "what are we doing today?" Or someone to discuss books, celebrity gossip, and relationships with - preferably all at the same time. Someone to watch bad tv with, do yoga with, and maybe even some traveling. That's exactly what I want! You can see why I liked this book. Plus there's this quote:

The author, Ann Patchett says—”Here’s my idea of real intimacy. It’s not the person who calls to say, 'I’m having an affair’; it’s the friend who calls to say, ‘Why do I have four jars of pickles in my refrigerator?’ ” [Bertsche continues] I want someone with whom I can talk about the deep stuff—hopes and dreams  and expectations and disappointments—and also the minutiae. Sometimes it takes talking about everything to get to the place where we can talk about nothing.

Rachel Bertsche makes a plan to meet as many women as she can and to go on a "date" with a new person every week for a year. Fifty two new potential friends. She meets women eveywhere she can - blind dates arranged by mutual friends, want ads, joining clubs & groups, and even picking-up strangers. Rachel learns a lot about herself, her relationship with her husband, and makes a lot of new close-acquantainces. She concludes that sometimes the only thing between a close-acquaintance and a lifelong BFF is time. She ends up with five or six women that she can see becoming BFFs with over time.


After reading this book I learned a few new things too. I need to give people a chance. Sometimes I judge people too quickly - about if I will click with them, or if we have enough in common. I have realized that the narrow range I have in my head of my ideal friend really should really be wider. I also learned that one person doesn't have to be all things to me. Including my husband. I can have different friends that fill different roles for me. I will always be looking for that local BFF who wants to hang with me practically every day, but I am realizing that if I never find that I'll be okay. And that every new friend I make is priceless.

Is It a Middle-Aged Thing?

As of my last birthday, I am officially counting myself as middle-aged. Granted, I am at the very bottom end of that spectrum, and other people might not put me in the middle yet, but I am not in my twenties or my early thirties anymore. And it feels good. I have no dismay over my age (other than my baby turning 4 yesterday!) and in some ways it feel nice to consider myself a full-fledged grown up now. Dad, if you're reading this, I still reserve the right to borrow money at some point in the future. You're still my father.

One of the things I have never done in my life is see a dermatologist. I know lots of teenagers go to one for the standard teenage acne stuff, but I just saw my pediatrician or GP for all of that. And as I age I am more concerned about wrinkles and skin cancer than acne. But not exclusively.

So I made my appointment, waited in the waiting room for AN HOUR, and finally had my turn to be examined. And in the end, I kind of felt like I had wasted my time and money. Here's what I came away with:

• I need to wash my face morning and night. Duh. I knew that (but still don't do it).
• Wear sunscreen. Um, yes, especially in Arizona. I did find out my daily 15 spf should be higher.
• Use good lotion/moisturizer EVERY time after you wash your hands. Apparently it's worth the effort and the excema problems on my fingers (under my rings) will probably be fixed by this.

And that's it. I found out that so much of what we fight is genetic & unless you want to drop money on cosmetic work (I might) then there's not much you can do about it. But I am hoping to do better at the above three things - wish me luck - and I think the most important thing I did was get an entire body inspection for skin cancer.  Which is a bit embarassing/uncomfortable but so important. That was worth the money by itself. Have you ever done this? I hear stories of people getting skin cancer in strange places and not noticing and I wanted a good baseline to start judging by. So I guess I will plan to get checked regularly now that I am middle-aged. Maybe every 3-4 years? What do you think? Do any of you go regularly? How often? Or are all my five remaining readers still in their twenties? You babies!

Also, what are your favorite products for face wash, daily moisturizer (with high spf), hand lotion, and eye cream? My dermatologist recommends Neutrogena.

2011 Books in Review

I read 68 books in 2011. That seems like a lot to me, averaging over one a week. Yet I still feel like my time would be better served reading more books and less blogs - and definitely watching less television. I review every book that I read on Goodreads, so check out my reviews for recommendations. But here are the best books I read last year.
Favorite 5 stars:

Sapphique (#2 Incarceron series), by Catherine Fisher
The One Hundred, by Nina Garcia
The Knife of Never Letting Go, by Patrick Ness - I gave the entire Chaos Walking Trilogy high marks
Jellicoe Road, by Melina Marchetta
The Forgotten Garden, by Kate Morton


Noteable 4 stars:

Dancing in my Nuddypants & Away Laughing on a Fast Camel, by Louise Rennison (hilarious series)
Mini-Shopaholic, by Sophie Kinsella (another light comedy)
My Life in France, by Julia Child
Daddy Long Legs, by Jean Webster (I bought this!)
Maisie Dobbs, by Jacqueline Winspear
Bloody Jack, by L.A. Meyer


My list for 2012:
The Book of Mormon (I will re-read this as my church studies it for Sunday School this year)
To Kill a Mockingbird, by Harper Lee (how have I never read this!?!)
finish Jane Eyre, by Charlotte Bronte - another I have missed over the years but am 70% through
The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin
The Maze Runner, by James Dashner
I Am the Messenger, by Marcus Zusak
The House at Riverton, by Kate Morton

I actually have 184 books on my To-Read list, but those are the ones I really want to get to in 2012.

Tara's bookshelf: read

Tara Carpenter's favorite books »

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Still Looking Tired

As a BzzAgent, I was offered the chance to try some fancy skin care products: Dr. Lewinn by Kinerase. I was sent the Under Eye Recovery and the Wrinkle Repair Daily Lotion. I used the Under Eye Recovery for a month and don't really have any complaints. I'm not sure if it helped my eyes look better, but it felt good when I used it every morning and evening. Here's the before and after photos, close-ups of my eyes that I'm not loving, but whatever. Looks like my eyebrows & pores need much more help than the bags under my eyes. In review, I can't recommend the Under Eye Recovery because I didn't notice any difference in my month of use.

I also received the Wrinkle Repair Daily Lotion to try. I used it for about a week, despite the fact that I didn't like it from the beginning. It was far too greasy for my already oily skin. I was really nervous about a break-out, but it din't happen. I think this might be a good product for someone with dry skin. I loved the light, citrusy scent. I can't comment on the wrinkle repair properties since I only used it for a week. Anybody else want to try mine?  I still have an almost full bottle.

Thanks Kinerase and BzzAgent for letting me try out these products but I am still on the look out for a good under eye cream. I'd like something that erases the bags & fixes/prevents wrinkles. Anyone have a suggestion?